The world is ending. Not because a bunch of Mexicans got drunk off a few Coronas, thousands of years ago, and decided to play Pictionary using a pyramid wall while drunk. The world is ending because my brother offered to take me out to dinner and pay for it. I had to take advantage of this situation quickly and carefully, before he changed his mind and text me back " Forget it, I'm going to order chinese and watch the Office". I quickly mentioned the Meatball shop. I don't know why. When it comes to meatballs I am very picky. In the hundreds of meatballs I have eaten in my life, I've only really loved two. I was pretty sure the meatball shop wouldn't be number three. But there was no turning back at this point.
My brother and I shot out to the Brooklyn location of The Meatball shop located on Bedford avenue in of course, Williamsburg. It was a Friday night and it was packed with a 10-20 minute waiting time. I feel any place that has a dense populations of hipsters should have a time limit on the table. Ever watch a hipster eat? It’s like watching a monkey fuck a football. I mean how long can you possibly talk about the collective works of Moby? The Meatball shop has an bar area, dimly lit with an open kitchen in the back along with some tables. My brother and I scored a seat in the back right in front of the open kitchen. The menu was a “ build your own “ checking off what kind of meatballs, sauce, cheese etc. One thing I have to point out is I noticed the word “ hero “ on the menu, describing the sandwich. Respect. This is fucking new york city, we call sandwiches on Italian bread, Hero’s. Not hoagies, grinders or subs. You want to call a sandwich something other than a hero, you should move back to motherfucking Ohio. Here’s what we ordered,
Classic Beef Meatballs ($9) A fresh hero topped with 3 meatballs, classic tomato sauce and fresh mozzarella. The meatball was decent, flavorful, not exactly what I was looking for texture wise, but it did the job. The sauce had a nice garlicky tang to it. The bread was fresh, crunchy out layer with a chewy inner.
Spicey Pork Meatblls ($9) Served on a hero with sauce and fresh mozz, These meatballs were pretty damn F good. A little bit more tender than the beef ones with a nice hint of spiced flavor. These meatballs also worked well with the sauce giving a little heat to go with the tanginess.
Risotto ($4) If I had a time machine, I would go back in time and not order this dish. It was really soupy and tasted like a shoe that has been hanging off a telephone pole for the past 12 years.
Polenta ($4) I tried the Risotto first, so I didn’t have high hopes for the polenta. Much like my choices in woman, I was wrong. The polenta was creamy with hints of parmigna and butter. Until this day I still have erotic fantasy about this polenta.
With two cokes, the bill came to a whopping $35. I was pissed. In my life I only take advantage of two situations, a free meal and sex. I was looking to piss my brother off with a huge bill but it didn’t happen. Meatball shop wasn’t what I was looking for meatball wise. But the vibe is cool, the food is decent and the price is on point. Would I return to Meatball shop? Hell yes. And as for finding the perfect meatball, my adventure continues on.
The Meatball Shop
170 Bedford Avenue, Brooklyn (2 other locations)
718 - 551-0520